How to Teach Kids to Bounce Back
By Sandy Schroeder
As an adult a child’s life may look simple, but if we pause a moment, most of us can remember some ups and downs in childhood. Helping our kids manage those moments may be one of the biggest favors we can do for them.
Think about your kids and the challenges you have seen them encounter. There is always the urge to shelter and keep them safe, but there’s also the need to help them learn to stand on their own and cope with the world. Sometimes it is hard to watch, but each child needs to learn to cope and to bounce back when things don’t go their way.
What It Takes
Kidsmatter.edu reminds us kids need a spirit of joy and pleasure to build upon. When we show up and let them know we are there for them, we are helping to firm up their view of their world. When we keep their routines level and just let them be kids, we create a world where it is good to be alive. Kids need that climate of wellness. It doesn’t have to be lavish or indulgent, but it does have to be warm and honest and strong.
Kidsmatter.edu points out qualities that help children cope with life.
- Confidence that they can do things for themselves and reach their goals
- Trust that there are caring people who will help them
- Assurance that they are valued for who they are
- Preparation to manage their own thoughts, feelings and actions
- A positive belief that things generally turn out OK
Kids develop their ability to handle life gradually. They start with small challenges and build confidence and experience to handle bigger demands as they grow. When they have good support, they can draw on that sense of security whenever life tests them.
To develop a sense of resilience a child needs these things.
- To know they are loved unconditionally
- To know someone they would like to be like
- To know they are in a safe place
- To be able to count on their family
- To know their efforts are valued
- To like who they are
- To have a sense of humor
- To know how to start a task and finish it
- To be open to try new things
- To be appreciated for trying and becoming independent
Each family is different, but we all want the best for our kids, and becoming strong and resilient will help them throughout life.
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