3 Keys to Keeping Your Comments Positive & Healthy
As the third trimester of my pregnancy nears its end, I've realized that there are a few things people have yet to learn are inappropriate to say. Hint: things like "wow, you're HUGE!" and "woah, are you having twins?" don't always go over well with pregnant women. The funny thing is, before I got pregnant, I was totally one of those people who lacked a filter. I suppose sometimes you really don't know until you've walked a mile in someone else's shoes. Well, now we're here to help. We want to assist you in avoiding those awkward, maybe I shouldn't have said that, situations. Here are a few things that, well, you just shouldn't say:
#1: "You look so much better! Did you lose weight/dye your hair/get a tan?"
It's really never ok to insinuate that someone didn't look good at a previous point in time. It's a much better idea to pay a compliment openly and positively. Say something to the effect of "I love your new haircut! It really suits you!" or "you look amazing! What's your secret?". Keeping compliments positive will truly allow the other person to feel good about themselves, with no strings attached.
#2: "When are you due?"
Unless you are absolutely positive that a woman is pregnant, do not, I repeat, DO NOT ask her when her due date is. I have made that mistake in the past and have come to deeply regret it not so shortly thereafter, when the other woman glared at me and said through clenched teeth, "I'm NOT pregnant". When in doubt, play it safe and just keep your question to yourself. It's definitely better than offending someone.
#3: "Why are you still single?"
While you may feel as though you are paying someone a compliment by expressing your surprise at their single status, it can actually be quite offending for some people. You are, for all intents and purposes, asking them to stew upon their lesser traits. So, instead, you can say something to the effect of, "wow! You are such a catch!". When in doubt, just remember that paying somebody a straight-up compliment goes way further than a semi, halfway compliment. People enjoy being complimented... They don't appreciate backhanded compliments or too-personal questions.
