What to Do When You Are Angry a Lot
By Sandy Schroeder
When we feel angry we may feel guilty and try to shake it off, but psychologists tell us anger is a normal emotion. To stay emotionally healthy we need to acknowledge anger and find out what may be triggering the reaction, according to PsychCentral.com.
Looking at What Can Happen
You may have weak boundaries - If you frequently say yes when you really mean no, you may exhaust your emotional resources and wind up feeling irritable and angry. Speaking up and actually saying no may free up your life and erase a lot of the anger.
You may be anxious - If you often feel worried about the issues in your life, anger may be a natural reaction, as you struggle to stay level. When something happens, it can be the spark that sets off a blaze of anger if you are already maxed out.
You may be tired and overloaded - If you are not sleeping well and facing a stream of tasks at home and work, it may be tempting to lash out and vent. Get realistic, get more sleep, and reduce your tasks. You may find yourself smiling a lot more.
You may be depressed - Irritability is a common symptom in depression. Talk with your doctor or a psychologist to explore the issue and find answers.
You may have issues with others - When we are angry with our friends, coworkers, kids or spouse, the frustration may simply boil over into anger. Sitting down to talk it out and dig through the issues can reduce anger as we uncover the problems and find solutions.
You may feel frustrated - If a situation in your life seems beyond your control, but you wind up dealing with the results, anger may steadily build until you look deeper to find ways to change the situation.
You may not recognize your feelings - Society may make us feel like we should avoid conflict and we mask our feelings to avoid hurting others. A healthier choice begins when we accept feelings and deal with them, reaching out to talk, listen and compromise.
Ways to Manage Anger
Here are some steps to deal with anger.
- Say how you are feeling without blaming others
- Watch for warning signs of anger
- Anticipate difficult situations
- Use deep breathing to stay level
- Be aware of negative thoughts that irritate you
- Ask for help if anger is a continuing problem
- Take a break when anger starts to build
If feelings of anger continue in spite of your efforts, you may want to talk with your doctor and see a psychologist to work on the issue.
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