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3 Ways You May Be Defeating Your Own Happiness

By Sandy Schroeder

If other people seem to be a lot happier than you are, they may have discovered how to take charge of their own happiness instead of letting others call the shots. took a look at some of the things that we may need to know and do to create our own happiness.

You May Care Too Much about Others’ Opinions

Long ago, a friend of mine told me that I cared too much about what others said about me. At the time I did not understand what he meant. As I moved through life, it was always important to me to look good, work well, and be valued by everyone around me. Gradually I learned what a roller coaster it can be to put other people in charge of your happiness. If they don’t think you look right, or work hard enough, you may feel crushed. At the same time, someone else may think you look just fine, and work very hard. Being true to your own values and judgments really is the only sane way to go.

Just Settling Instead of Being Where You Want to Be

All of us have worked with someone who counted the days until vacation, or tenure, or retirement. Their job meant little to them, but they were sticking it out to collect the benefits. That can be a terrific loss of daily pleasure and talent. If that person made the effort to find the right spot they might actually enjoy coming to work and spend less time counting the days. They might also contribute a lot more to the job if they put their heart into it. Think about where you are, and where you might want to be. If you like your spot, do your best and enjoy being there. If it’s really not right, keep working, but start looking for the job that really fits you. It’s out there waiting. You just have to decide to find it.

Not Really Being Honest with Yourself

If you look deeply into your thoughts and habits, are you always honest with yourself? Do your efforts really reflect your views, or do you just go along for the ride? Others around you may think entirely different than you do. It’s good to respect their opinions, but when asked you should be able to honestly express your views, too.

Think about how you handle difficult situations. Do you tell your kids to talk through anger to avoid lashing out, and then turn around and explode when something goes wrong?

Try to say what you mean and follow through with what you do. 

Being honest with yourself, making your own judgements, and not just settling can make a big difference in happiness. Try it. You may love the results.

To learn more about your health, wellness, and fitness, see your local chiropractor at The Joint Chiropractic in Tampa, Fla.

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