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How to Handle a Confrontation

By Sandy Schroeder

In a fast-paced world that requires us to respond quickly and accomplish a lot, problems can come up. People, with the best of intentions, wind up with different reactions to situations and sometimes confrontations are hard to avoid. Wherever and whenever issues come up, at home, at work, or in the community, facing a confrontation is never easy.

  • You may dread confronting a friend about remarks that were made after you left the party
  • You may gulp when you need to tell a co-worker what you think of their work
  • You may hesitate to ask a relative not to bring that adorable but noisy dog along on their next visit

What to Do

WellAndGood.com wades in to help, pointing to new research that says truth may be the best idea. Researchers say they have discovered confrontations usually go better than expected when everyone sticks to the truth.

What Happens When We Have to Be Honest

The Journal of Experimental Psychology published a study with three different experiments requiring participants to be honest.

  • Participants had to be 100 percent honest with everyone around them for three days
  • Participants had to be honest with someone who they were close to, answering tough personal questions
  • Participants had to give honest, negative feedback to someone close to them

Study author Emma Levin said, “We think offering critical feedback or opening up about our secrets will be uncomfortable for both us and the people with whom we’re talking.”

What Happened

Researchers found the end results were not that bad. Sometimes there were benefits when outright lies, or little white ones, were left out.

Feared repercussions were much less than expected or absent. In some cases, conversations were totally positive, leading to more talks and better results. If the participant had not been honest, they might have missed a real breakthrough.

As you read this, you may be shaking your head and muttering, “No way.”  Or you might wonder what would happen if you approached a dreaded confrontation with more honesty. You know the people involved, and the history of the situation, so you may be the best judge.

What Could Happen

I really wonder about the experiment in which you have to give 100 percent honest answers for three days to everyone around you. I can practically see the sparks flying and the smoke rising!  I have friends who actually may not be capable of doing this! (Just kidding.) 

Best advice, start with your gut response and take readings of the reactions of others.

  • Do your homework about the people involved
  • Be as fair and low-key as possible
  • Weigh hurt feelings against delivering much-needed truths

Finally, buckle up and expect the unexpected. When people really appreciate your honesty and respond in kind, life may get a lot better.

To learn more about your health, wellness, and fitness, see your local chiropractor at The Joint Chiropractic in Pearland, Tex.

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